This week we have been learning about microagressions, most of the time unintended insults. For this weeks blog assignment we need to be conscience of what was going on around us. My sister-in-law and I sell LuLaRoe. It is a newer direct sales clothing boutique that makes stylish but super comfortable clothes in sizes 2 T to 3 XL and the softest leggings you will ever wear (shameless plug:o)). We were at an event and a wife had stopped in to look at the clothes and fell in love with a shirt. She pulled it out a couple of times and talked about how she loved the colors. We talked for a bit and she walked to check out the next vendor booth. About 20 minutes later she comes back with her husband to show him the shirt she really liked. She was a heavier lady, He looked at her and then the shirt and said, "That shirt will never fit your arms." Her face fell. He looked clueless. He did not even realize his comment had hurt is wife. I felt so bad for her. She kinda nodded and walked away and he soon followed.
This weeks observations has affected my perceptions of the effects of discrimination, prejudice and stereotypes on people. It showed me that we really need to think before we speak. That we unconsciously can really hurt a person with what we say. I think that the saying is true, that physical hurts can heal and go away over time but words always stay with us. We might not think we are prejudice, discriminate or perpetuate stereotypes but we are with the unconscious comments we all make sometimes.
Brandie
Brandie,
ReplyDeleteI can only imagine how the lady would have felt; ashamed, sad and definitely hurt. It probably would not have felt really hurt if that statement was made by someone else. Coming from her husband; one that is meant to have her best interest at heart! I really agree with you that we really need to think before we speak. Comments about one’s physical appearance can easily erode one’s self esteem. I hope she tells him about it.
Great example!
Brandie,
ReplyDeleteI think this is a great example. I have lost over 100 pounds over the past 2 1/2 years and I could only imagine how this woman felt to be told by her husband that she would not be able to fit the shirt. I remember being the larger person in my group of friends and I hated going shopping with them because there was nothing in Charolette Rouse, Rue 21, or Aeropastle that would fit me except a size 7 or 8 shoe. Now that I am much smaller and able to shop in these stores comfortably, I still have a lower self esteem when trying clothes on because my mind thinks that I will look huge, when in reality, the clothes fit perfectly. I wish that she talks with her husband about the experience or that someday he realizes that he has made her feel insecure about her weight. My husband has been supportive of me, regardless my size and I can only pray that her husband realizes that her weight is apart of her self esteem and makes things better.
Junell